ahestele: (Default)
Which I didn't plan but I am happy with. I know many people have moved on to DW and I have an account, and I check it regularly, and try to cross-post, since the xpost was broken for a bit, but this is where I first discovered fandom, where I posted my first fic, where I found people I've known since 2002. I love this place.



I'm actually not sure which is more amusing: that we have discovered our neighbors are a Baptist minister, his wife, and three little girls on one side and a retired Mormon couple on the other whose sons just got back from Mission on the other OR..

that last night a cricket found it's way in the house, amusing Talullah the cat and Henry our Maltese mix (Jax is too mature to run around chasing crickets), and, when I was trying to sleep, it began to trill deafeningly. D went to find it and put it outside because she is Butch and that is her JOB thank you, and when she finally had it esconced in a towel and opened the sliding glass door the insect hatched a mad plan for re-entry and clung to her hand trilling causing her to shreik (most un-Butch ;-D) and wave her hand to flick it away.

I'm sure our Baptist neighbor is now scandalized at the naked lesbians having pagan dances in the pale moonlight or something LOL.

In closing, I have had Closer by Tegan and Sara as an earworm for DAYS and I LUV IT. I'm probably all late to their cuteness but, seriously, how earnest and darling are these babydykes??

Cute bite-sized lesbians for everyone! You are welcome!

Have a great day, gente! Talk at ya'll later.
ahestele: (Marshall)
+ Apologies for bad form, but for reasons that I don't understand, I can no longer access LJ from my work computers. This IS TO CRY. It is considered a 'malicious' site, or whatever, which, okay, yes, if you're referring to the clueless Russion overlords or whatever. But it is still damned inconvenient.

Maybe this total migration is a good idea. :-/

+ Also, and in closing, we watched the American version of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and I have THE WORST GIRLCRUSH on Lisbeth Salander. She is so BROKEN AND HOT AND BROKEN AND FIERCELY INTELLLIGENT I am all *hearteyes*. The story of my life is in there somewhere. *LOL*

I want fic and I don't even know what kind. I just want to read about her being badass and awesome and having those brilliant faint, faint whispers of humanity that make me all verklempt.

I guess I need to give the book another try because it bored me shitless at the first go and I couldn't get past the first chapter.

Sadly, I must go now.

The lover is fighting the second go-round of a stubborn cold and she gets what my sister calls 'mansick.' She is totally and completely useless when she is this sick and is very pitiful and weak and frowny.

Ergo, I must take the bus tomorrow.

I'll shout at ya'll later.


In closing, the high today was 66 and tomorrow it is 71. Sometimes the South is a good place to be. :-)
ahestele: (red angel)

+ As we know, the last road trip to attend my nieces's sweet sixteen party ended in extreme emotional turmoil and recrimination. D refuses to return to my parent's home so I am going alone for the Christmas holiday. I intended to stay with my sister Ann and my niece because A) My parents have 11 dogs. No, really, 11 and B) I am still very angry at my mother.

My mother calls my cell phone and she makes me so. Fucking. Crazy. )

If it is possible for my family to be more dysfunctional I'm quite sure I don't know how.

HOW CAN IT BE THE 21ST!!!# JFC#@%T%T!!!!

+ I am behind on decorating and shopping AND

+ A stack of cards I made to mail out on Monday are missing. As in, they were there and when I got ready to mail them, they were not there. They have VANISHED IN MY APT WHAT. Now a bunch of people won't get cards because I am out of time. And I have a SAD.

+ I waited alltogether too long to order things for xmas and now they will all be late.

+ I am made of enormous fail this holiday season. :-P


+ If you are a conservative Republican mayor from Mississippi you probably shouldn't buy sex toys at well know gay sex toy shops. Not even in Canada.

+ If you are a conservative Republican and have run for governor on a platform of anti-gay legislation, perhaps you ought not act as a sperm donor for lesbian couples. Not even in New Zealand.


I meant to bake more and buy more presents but I am all tharn.

HOWEVER, Frankie the Laptop is back after a visit to the computer dr. and he is much better. *pets Frankie*

Also, I am VERY VERY ANGRY at Boardwalk Empire. VERY ANGRY. WTAF?

That is all.

I will post more later, gente! But if I don't, happy holidays! Here's to a better next year!

PS: Chocolate chip cookie crumbs have fallen down my bra. Ergh.
ahestele: (red angel)
I'm trying to get better about updating here AND LJ, so let's see how that goes, yes?

There are bad, ugly, and good things to be had. Hence:



So I've spoken of how relieved I am that D is now seeing real drs. who don't just throw meds at her and how this is good because she would probably be dead if she hadn't switched over. I am very, very grateful she now has real drs because they found stuff the public health system never did, like the disc degeration in her spine, and the lack of vitamin D in her system. HOWEVER, it is taking all her social security to pay for this. I'm not kidding; basically all her check is going to pay for her meds, drs. visits, and procedures. Do you know WHY? Because they are counting MY income. We are not legally married (not in TX, baby), I can't leave her my worldly possessions without a lot of paperwork, I can't make medical decisions without a Directive of Physician and Power of Attorney, drs can REFUSE TO DEAL WITH ME in a medical crisis even WITH said paperwork (I have seen it happen many, many times), but by god my income can be used to deny her benefits! Hells, yeah, because in that instance we are PARTNERS, we are COHABITATING, and her co-pay for drs visits and meds just went up. Again.

You know, I want to be legally married. I want to go into debt and buy a house I can't afford as much as the next straight couple. But I can't. Why am I, then, being given none of the benefits but all of the consequences? Can anyone tell me?

Because this really PISSES ME OFF.

If anyone would like to calmly and rationally explain to me how this is okay, feel free. However, I do not promise to respond, and myself and my bouncing checking account most certainly do not promise to agree with you.

+ The gulf is dying. I can't even watch footage of the poor dying pelicans and suffocated marshes anymore because there are only so many ways to say, and show, that WE ARE FUCKED.

+ Why are all the world cup soccer games held during the day WHY?!? I can't watch any of them that way! :-( Anyone got a live feed link I can view on my lunch hour?


+ What fresh hell is THIS?!? Did people all get high and vote for this individual? Is HE high? I watched the CNN interview with him and, wow. That was some painful shit right there. IDEFK.

+ Reports say this might a really lively hurrican season. Do you know what's going to happen to all that oil in the gulf if we have a decent sized hurricane? I'll leave ya'll with that mental image.


+ Celebrated 19 years with D this weekend! We went to a party for my cop friend April's lover and had a truly sinful lunch at Laurenzo's. We also watched world cup soccer and Trueblood. We are so exciting! You all envy us, we know. :-)

+ The cover pix for RECOVERY, Marshall's new CD, are out and they are BEAUTIFUL. )

The rest are here and they are AMAZING! Eight days! I can't wait! :-DDDDDDDDDDDDD

+ How awesome was Sean Hayes on the Tony Awards? I didn't know he had piano chops that way! I also really love Kristin Chenoweth a lot. I had to leave to go watch the vampire show, but what I saw was awesome.


+ Hung will be back at the end of June. That is happy-making.

+ Does anyone else think the new Rhona Mitra show 'The Gates' is going to suck (haha. No, seriously...)? I loves me some Rhona Mitra; she's how I'd look if I had a choice and a magical genie. However, the previews look kind of cheestastic. Thots?

+ I am going to Barcelona for work, again. I am also, somehow, going to Guadalajara for work. And also DragonCon. I'm not sure how this all happened, but that is three major trips in a three month period. I am glad to be going, but somewhat afeared...

+ I have fifteen pages of the copfic I sent to beta...I am now rewriting the last half because that is what a good beta does for you. So it will be a bit longer till posting, but I'm excited about the fic like I haven't been in a long time. :-)

Okay, gente. I'm sure there's more, but I have work on my perky if I'm going to read to babies and mommies in half an hour.

You all have a good day and I'll talk at you later.
ahestele: (spikeahestele)
May everyone in the Western hemisphere that celebrates Easter have a fabulous Bunny Day!

I am sitting here finishing the latest Kim Harrison and watching Jax worry a chew bone within an inch of its life. :-) D has decided she is not ready to be up and is watching TV in bed.

We plan to go to a movie sometime today and also go grocery shopping so I can get more diet stuff. My calorie counting was blown like a blown thing this week with D's nephew visiting but I plan to get right back on that wagon tomorrow. I really did feel better eating less.

Now, before I go points? Points.

+ Dreamwidth- I'd like a code like many other people, and, like many other people, I don't plan to abandon LJ alltogether. However, I like that DW is fan-friendly, understanding the particular fandom mindset because it was developed, in part, by a fanfic writer. If I don't get a code I believe I will purchase an account when they become available later, though it has become obvious that I fail in my attempt at being bi-journal. We shall see. I am excited at the prospect of a place that will not judge what I read or write. I think that is nothing but a good thing.

+ I am starting to spend a lot of time thinking of writing these days. I hope this is another step in beginning to write regularly once again. I miss that part of my life; I'm not even sure how or why it went away, not totally. Right now I think I want to try a small James Iha/Taylor Hanson ficlet. I don't have anything but the very strange, very intriguing thought of them together. I'm going to watch some Iha interviews on YouTube and see where it goes from there.

+ Kings is cancelled, goddamn it. I love that show. It's also disheartening. Is it true? Is all quality TV doomed to failure because it does not aim for the muddling middle ground? Why do quality things mostly need to be on cable to survive? This was a fantistically realized show. It had great actors, a thoughtful, intelligent script, and brave direction. Why must everything be fucking American Idol? *sigh*

+ D's nephew H left to go back to GA after a week of breavment leave. He will always be a kid to me, tho he is a thirty year old service man who has been to Afghanistan and Guantanamo Bay. He's also a good man, and there are not many of those. Fiercely smart, tall, dark, and handsome, and with an even-tempered kindness borne of balancing out his dad all these years, I really hope he finds someone worthy to live his life with. He has been alone with is dad's illness, mantal and physical, for so long, that he deserves some happiness and someone who knows how awesome he is. Anyone who knows a nice girl that won't fuck him over, hook me up.

+ Went to a cook-off at my Cop Friend April's last night and it was fun. We were one of only a handful of non-cop women there but the food was good and the conversation funny and interesteing. The funniest thing tho was that I had been told by co-workers that a cute young guy had been by to see me on Friday when I was off, tall, and wearing a cap, and I was at a loss as to whom it might have been because both Russell and Justin, the teen boys' from across the way, are both kind of short.

Found out that Megan, a lovely, androgynous girl I know through April, had come by to say 'Hi', as she had promised to do, while she was studying for her Sargeant's exam. She is fond of baseball caps over her really pretty face and buzz cut hair and she is given to t-shirts and jeans that hide what slim curves there are to her lanky body. She kind of resembles a palomino colt.

'A young guy.' Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! :-D

+ To wrap up, I have had the score from 'Once More With Feeling' in my head for DAYS. God, I miss my show.

Okay, gente. I am getting hungry so I am going to either scare up some food in ye olde kitchen, or go get D's arse in gear to go find some.

Have a wonderful holiday weekend and I'll talk at ya'll later.
ahestele: (Abbybadday)
A virtual cookie for thems that can name that song/band.

Points because I am too exhausted for anything else.

+ You know what you should NEVER do? You should NEVER give two smallish dogs corn cobs to chew. NEVER EVER. Except we used to give them to our first Toy Fox Terrier Hunie and she loved them and was fine. She'd chew them down to the spiny core then leave them alone. Never affected her badly. These two? ATE the whole thing. Like, everything.

+ Which, of course cued puking on both their parts. ALL NIGHT LONG.

+ Partially on my pillow while my head was still on it.

+ And the couch, where I had moved to avoid changing the sheets at 2:45 a.m.

+ Causing me to move back to the bed, adding fresh sheets, and leaving both dogs on the floor on their blankets where they whined and cried amidst bouts of puking until about 4 a.m. when they drifted off.

+ At which point I could not sleep, too worried about the perils of dehydration in small dogs, how little time I actually HAD to sleep, and deep resentment for D who was not here to stop me from giving them the guddamn corn cobs in the first place.

+ I know it was my fault. I just didn't care at ass o'clock in the morning.

+ This morning both are bright eyed and wiggly, if a bit glassy eyed and when I left they didn't even bark, both of them curled up on fresh blankets dozing off. Must be nice.

+ Oh, my god I am tired.

+ I am having a skim milk white chocolate mocha because I NEED CAFFEINE, MAN. Screw the calorie count today

+ And, to make it more fabulous, I actually have to stay late again today because I booked the GLBT speaker for tonight's program and I'm the contact. Attorney Debra Hunt from the Houston law firm Moore & Hunt is going to discuss legal options for gay and lesbian couples involving living wills, power of attorney, and directive of physician. FREE! She is here for Women's History Month.

If I didn't feel like pan fried poo I'd be excited.

+ Randomly, I have discovered I cannot come across the movie 'Enchanted' without watching the whole thing. It is apparently my new Steel Magnolias/Grease/Original Hairspray. I think Amy Adams is purty.

OK, gente. I gotta go.

I have two days off after this, then Sunday, but that is only four hours with bonus overtime.

Twelve more hours. Pray for me.
ahestele: (Default)
For serious. What crack is this bitch on?

Not only is she profoundly ungrammatical, I mean, really, I am embarassed for her, I can't believe they are actually authorizing this kind of bigotry in their recruiting personnel. And how thick do you have to be to try and recruit an out gay pissy queen anyway?!?!?!

The emails are a celebration of the stupid, let me tell you. I mean, I realize he probalby shouldn't have tried to win a pissing contest from an, um, twatwaffle, minus the waffle, but at least he didn't have the authorization of our fair government behind him. So to speak.

Also, why are NICK CARTER, the kid from Air Bud and Transamerica and Stacy Keach on my TV in some cheesy SciFi Channel After School Special-esqe movie about Ichabod Crane? How many things are bizarre about that?

Wow, that Air Bud kid has some killer dimples....
ahestele: (rainbowstar)
I say basically because my fascination with the pretty boys of fandom has caused many a scratched head and puzzled look among my RL friends. I joke a lot about losing my Dyke Card (which, incidentally, I believe has happened) and making a lousy lesbian (which, between the mansex writing, the pretty boy squeeing, and the shameful lack of dyke music on my MP3 player, is probably true) but basically, still and all, I don't drive stick.

Not that I think having lesbian sex MAKES you lesbian any more than birthing a baby MAKES you a mother. But it still seems to be the litmus test with which we are judged and the one that dictates which neat label one can be filed under, and that's okay. I'm really kind of okay with labels. I find them comforting and often accurate and, also, quite a lot of fun to dismantle. Much like stereotypes.

The fact remains that I do NOT, in fact, drive stick in RL, and that I have, in fact, had the same lover for nigh on fifteen years. Give or take a hiatus or two.

The fact also remains that unless I TELL people or I am with my lover, who is really quite butch, few people who look at me know I'm gay. I'm Latina, short and round, and femme. I have long hair. I am fond of dangly earrings. I pass very well; I always have.

I come out as often as I can BECAUSE I truly do believe that unless people DO come out as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered, those handy labels and stereotypes, they will not be distmantled. All gay men are swishy and all dykes are mannish and all bisexuals are sex maniacs and all FTMs or MTFs are twisted and. Full stop. And that is wrong.

This is the same reason I am fairly open about my life, my lover, my interests and beliefs.

This is not to say that those who are not ready to come out are THE EV0L WRONG REPRESSED HERETIC BAD GAY PERSON! No. Coming out is a personal decision and to be shoved out of the closet without your consent or permission can be traumatic and very damaging.

But I am saying maybe take this day to think about it?

Because we ARE everywhere. We ARE everyone.

So Happy National Coming Out Day, gente!

Have a good one!



ahestele: (Default)

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